Leaving to DIE

In the last years of the last century I suddenly disappeared from everyone in my life including my family from whom my light is fed. I had to tell my mother because Mommy was, and has always been deeply connected to my spirit. To physically leave without a word to her was unthinkable. She would and did call my spirit, and in answer I left a book, "The Alchemist"  with her, and an understanding that if she read it she would understand her first-born. 

Leaving was a drastic step made without pondering. It was a simple act of power, a reaction to a simple disappointment compounded by many weights. I was in the middle of a phone call. A sales call. The phone shut off. I couldn't pay the bill. In that one moment everything within me crashed and I heard myself say, "I can't take this shit no more."

I was in a daze, a stupor. I vaguely remember what I did next, but I do recall a bag in my hand with a few items including some books, clothes, a knife...  Days passed me. I know I went places, slept somewhere, felt some things, walked, but I cannot draw them up in my mind. I cried a lot for the woman I knew would forever live within me, but was not able to 'see' me, and for my children, at the time, lost to me. I was in a strange kind of darkness, but a deeper light came from somewhere, as was prophesied by Old Man, and I received the outcome of the massive amounts of spiritual work I'd put in for many years. It was mind blowing what came and still comes to me. That kind of death was worth the birth. - Gregory E. Woods, 2.22.13

a Medicine Wheel of a Shaman
from Bear Warrior

Elder's Meditation of the Day - December 28, 2012 

"I believe that being a medicine man, more than anything else, is a state of mind, a way of looking at and understanding this earth, a sense of what it is all about."
-- Lame Deer, LAKOTA

The Medicine Wheel explains different ways of looking at the world. The four directions are the East, the South, the West, and the North. In the East is the view of the eagle. The eagle flies high and sees the earth from that point of view. The South is the direction of the mouse. Moving on the earth, the mouse will not see what the eagle sees. Both the eagle and the mouse see the truth. The West is the direction of the bear. The bear will see different from the mouse and the eagle. From the North comes the point of view of the bison. To be a Medicine Man you must journey through all points of view and develop the mind to see the interconnectedness of all four directions. This takes time, patience, and an open mind. Eventually, you understand there is only love.

Great Spirit, today, allow my mind to stay open